


Secrets Between Brothers

by My_Trex_has_fleas



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Book Universe, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-24
Updated: 2015-06-24
Packaged: 2018-04-05 23:18:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4198833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/My_Trex_has_fleas/pseuds/My_Trex_has_fleas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A one shot that takes place between the debacle in Rivendell and the Stone Giant debacle.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Secrets Between Brothers

**Author's Note:**

> Right, so I have been reading Frailty and it has destroyed me. This is my make-me-feel-better-fic.
> 
> kidhuzurâl - my golden one  
> askadith - little shadow  
> nadadith - little brother

It had been two days since they had flown from Rivendell in the middle of the night and things had not gotten any better since they had started this Aüle forsaken quest. Except now of course they had no ponies, and had to carry everything between them. And while dwarves were built for moving swiftly through dark low hanging tunnels, they were not made for extended hikes through woodland and grassland. Add to that the vegetarian diet that had been more or less enforced while they had been guests of the elves, and a belligerent would be king bellowing orders at them, and what you had was a situation that would make anyone miserable.

Kili looked to where Fili stomped not three paces ahead of him. His brother was angry. Not just angry, but downright pissed off if the truth be told. Not that the others in the company could tell, but Kili could read his brother as easily as reading the signs of the game he tracked. And what made it worse was that Fili was angry with him. But the fact that he was angry was a secret that only he and Kili shared.

Everyone was used to Thorin’s anger, and Kili took enough after him to have the same quick temper. But often, it was over as soon as it had begun. Fili on the other hand, was not only the image of their deceased father but had his temperament as well. And while Vili hadn’t been anywhere near as aristocratic as the Durins, he had been from minor royalty in the East, and his noble bearing and composure had been inherited by his older son. He didn’t roar when he was angry, like Thorin, Kili and Dis did. He froze instead, that coolness he usually carried turning to bitter frost. And so he had been, ever since the debacle with the ponies. And then in Rivendell, just as it seemed Fili was starting to thaw a little, Kili had gone and put his foot in his mouth again by flirting with a stupid elf of all things. Fili had been livid, and the angrier he got, the quieter and icier he got.

Kili knew that Fili was by nature honest and open, his naturally sunny disposition making him popular in Ered Luin as well as among the others of the company. He disliked secrets, but carried them for Kili. And of course the reason they were on the quest in the first place was yet another one that they held between them. It had been Kili who had wanted to come, to test himself and prove himself worthy of his royal title. He was widely considered to be flighty and inconsistent by other dwarves. He was lacking in concentration, unable to excel in his lessons because he was too often daydreaming or simply not paying attention. But one of Kili’s secrets was that when he wanted something, truly wanted it so much he could practically taste it, then he became as focused as a beam of sunlight through a lens. When he wanted something he would move heaven and earth to get it. He’d wanted to learn archery. He’d wanted to be a hunter. He’d wanted the quest. And, above all, he’d wanted his big brother.

Fili’s secret was that, while he was considered stoic and unmovable, he was easily swayed by his little brother. Kili knew that Fili would give him anything he asked for. And while he was always dogging Fili’s steps during the day like a shadow, something he’d done since he could toddle after his brother, at night when the lanterns had been blown out and they were alone in their shared room it was Kili who lead. He was the instigator, the one who made the advances. The one who seduced. It had been him who had first climbed into Fili’s bed, naked and wanting. It had been him who’d stifled his brother’s protests with kisses, him who had taken Fili’s hand and placed it on his cock, already hard and desperate for Fili’s touch. And it had been him that had kept it going, always breaking down Fili’s arguments with touches and kisses that left his brother unable to resist him.

But when they had come on the quest it had stopped. Fili had insisted. In dwarven culture lying with a man was tolerated, but lying with a sibling was an offence punishable by banishment if they were lucky, and death if they weren’t. So Fili had laid down the ground rules, that there was to be nothing between them that would give them away. It had been his price for allowing them to join the quest.

And Kili had been able to stick to it, for the first couple of weeks. But then the lack of intimacy between them had started to tell on him. He had made small overtures to Fili, only to be rebuffed repeatedly. In hindsight Fili had made a poor choice in handling Kili that way, but he was distracted by the quests and worried for the safety of both his brother and uncle. And when they had been tasked with looking after the ponies Kili had seen it as a golden opportunity to seduce his big brother anew. It had almost worked as well. In fact, Kili had got so far as getting Fili into the bushes and on top of him, his tongue in Kili’s mouth and one hand down Kili’s breeches when they had heard the sound of something big and heavy crashing through. Then had come the thing with the hobbit and the trolls, and then Kili had had to try and save Bilbo all by himself. Fili had been furious, and had completely distanced himself from Kili, even going so far as to go sleep on the other side of the fire next to Ori. And Fili knew that Kili knew how Ori felt about Fili. It was an open secret back in Ered Luin that Ori was enamoured with Fili, blushing whenever he spoke to him. It made Kili furious.

Part of it was because Fili was convinced that Thorin knew what they had been up to when the ponies had been snatched. He had had the feeling that their uncle was not as oblivious to their nocturnal activities as he made out. And while Kili was able to lie through his teeth without blinking, Fili was not. So withdrawing from him was the only way that Fili thought they could keep their secret.

Which bought Kili back to the business with the elf. He hadn’t realised the tall elegant creature was a male when he’d winked at him. He’d simply been trying in his own clumsy way to throw Thorin off the scent. It had backfired spectacularly. Thorin had been outraged that he was even thinking of consorting with an elf. But Fili, well Fili had simply seen his lover flirting with another man. And then Kili had to add hurt to angry. Fili had spent the rest of their time in Rivendell studiously ignoring him, except at dinner when he’d gone to sit at the other table, blue eyes flashing looks that cut Kili to the quick.

He was brought back to the present by Balin calling to Thorin for them to stop. His uncle was like a man possessed now, and wanted nothing more to get to Erebor as quickly as possible, but the blistering pace he’d set had had a serious toll on the company in the last two days.

‘It’s no good, Thorin.’ Balin was saying, ‘We’re exhausted. We need to rest, to eat. The burglar can barely stand anymore.’ Kili smiled to himself. Balin was canny. His uncle’s preoccupation with their newest member had not gone unnoticed. ‘A night is all we ask.’ Thorin stopped, his face clearly showing the conflict raging inside him. Eventually a look at their puffing hobbit swayed him.

‘Very well.’ he said, ‘One night only and we push on at first light.’ The rest of the company drew a collective sigh of relief, and started to set up camp. It was still light and would be for a good couple for hours.

‘Kili.’ Thorin called, and he went forward. His uncle put his hand on his shoulder, and Kili was pleased to note that he’d obviously gotten over the pony incident. ‘We could do with something to eat that doesn’t grow in the ground.’

‘I’ll go.’ he said, maybe a little too quickly. He hadn’t had the opportunity to do much hunting and missed it desperately. Back in Ered Luin he was used to disappearing for hours at a time. He put down his gear with the rest of the supplies, and then went to Fili, who was busy building a fire for Bombur. Ori was helping him, and Kili bristled.

‘Fili, I’m going hunting.’ he said, and Fili half turned his head, but didn’t look at him. ‘Would you like to come with me?’ His heart sank when he heard the icy tone of the reply.

‘No.’ Fili said flatly, ‘I have tasks to do here.’ He didn’t even look at him. Kili huffed angrily and stormed off by himself. He didn’t see Fili look over his shoulder and watch him go.

***********

He was gone for a couple of hours, but it was worth his while. He’d stalked and shot a doe, finishing her off with his hunting knife before he gutted her and hung her to drain. He’d indulged in a couple of slices of raw liver, feeling the strength run back into his limbs from the iron rich meat. Then he’d trussed her up and slung her over his shoulder. Now he was making his way back to the camp, but decided to detour to the river that ran nearby, one of the reasons they’d stopped. He could clean off his knife and, time permitting have a wash. His own stink was rich in his nostrils and the deer’s blood hadn’t helped matters.

He got to the river bank, but the water swirled too quickly in that part. Dwarves were heavily built with dense bones and had a tendency to sink. He also had no wish to have a repeat of when he and Fili had fallen in the river before they had had their run-in with the trolls. So he followed it upstream, and soon it started to form a series of pools, the water darkening to deep green where it collected. He spotted a likely looking one just up ahead. It was fed from the top and flowed out the bottom, which meant the water would constantly be refreshed, ideal for a bath. But as he approached something caught his attention and made him stop, then creep forward so stealthily that only an elf would have heard him. When he got closer he could make out the sound. It was a cradle song that he knew well. It was one that Dis had sung to him every night. The voice that was singing it was as familiar as his own, and he put the doe down, listening.

It was another secret they kept. Thorin was well known for his singing voice, but what people didn’t know was that his eldest nephew was possessed of a voice that was even more melodic and sonorous than his. But Fili didn’t sing in public, or even in front of their mother and uncle. He’d spent so long in Thorin’s shadow that he had no confidence in himself some times. But he sang to Kili, and when he was alone. And it was his beautiful voice that Kili heard now, intoning the words in Khudzul that went with the lilting melody. And as Kili came out from the undergrowth he saw his brother, sitting by the side of the river, his boots off and stripped to the waist. His bare feet were in the water, breeches rolled to the knees, and his broad shoulders with their dark blue tattoos were turned so the sun was on his back. The last rays of sun caught his hair, loosened on one side of his head from his normal braids, burnishing it to bright gold. There was little more beautiful to Kili than his brother’s hair, his own personal golden hoard. He watched him, getting lost in the graceful movements of Fili’s hands as he started to work on the other pair of braids and he was so distracted that he stepped on a twig. It cracked noisily underfoot.

Fili went from relaxed to battle ready in under a second, a throwing knife appearing in his hand seemingly by magic. Kili threw up his hands.

‘It’s me.’ he called, stepping out from the undergrowth. Fili relaxed visibly when he saw him, lowering the knife.

‘You idiot.’ he said, ‘I could have killed you.’ Kili retrieved the deer, and walked down towards him. He laid it on the ground, and Fili gave it him an approving look, the first in days.

‘What are you doing?’ Kili asked, even though he could very well see what Fili was doing. But he was desperate to engage his brother after so much silence. Fili gave him a look. Then he sat down again and sighed.

‘I thought I would clean up a bit.’ he said, ‘My braids are a mess and so am I.’ he gave Kili a sidelong look. ‘You’re not exactly looking your best either.’

‘I know.’ Kili said, coming to sit next to him. He busied himself with pulling off his boots. ‘I really wanted a bath.’ He kept his eyes firmly downcast and then started as he felt a tentative touch on his face.

‘Your beard's growing too long.’ Fili said. ‘Want me to cut it?’ It was yet another of their secrets. All the other dwarves thought Kili was simply incapable of growing a beard. What they didn’t know was that he had been able to grow a very respectable beard for at least a decade now. But it didn’t sit well with archery, getting caught constantly, so Fili kept it cut short for him. But that was a secret so terrible, it was probably even worse than incest. No dwarf would ever cut their beard and go about bare-faced through choice.

Kili looked at him, their eyes locking. It sent a wave of heat through him, and that was yet another secret. For while he was headstrong and wilful and impulsive, always making enough noise to get his own way, it was really he who was controlled. He was in thrall to a pair of summer blue eyes and hair that rivalled even the greatest treasures that Erebor might harbour, to a gentle voice and a strong body that made him scream and moan and dig welts into Fili’s back.

He opened his mouth but no sound wanted to come out. He settled for nodding instead. Fili leaned back, reaching into the folds of his discarded clothing and retrieving a small wicked looking knife. He beckoned to Kili.

‘You’d better take your shirt off first.’ He said, and Kili stripped his top layers off and then his undershirt. There was a light chill in the air and his nipples hardened. He caught Fili looking at them and his heart jumped in response. He moved so he was standing over Fili’s legs, then got down so he was sitting in Fili’s lap. He bent his knees, feet flat on either side of his brother. Fili bent his own knees behind Kili, giving him something to lean back against. They were close now, and Fili reached up, taking Kili’s chin in his hand. Kili focused on his face, watching the blue eyes narrow in concentration.

‘Hold still.’ he said, just like he always did and Kili steadied his breathing. Fili started working with the grain, the short black bristles falling like coal dust onto Kili’s bared skin. Kili luxuriated in the intimacy of the act and their physical proximity. These were his best times, these quiet moments with the only person in the world he wanted to be with. He’d often suspected that Fili was his One, but had never voiced these thoughts. He shifted and got a jab in the ribs for his trouble.

‘I said to hold still.’ Fili said, but his voice was soft now, and it soothed Kili’s soul like nothing else could.

‘Fee,’ he said eventually, the nickname coming unbidden to his lips. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘I know, Kee.’ Fili responded, not taking his eyes off where he was running the blade over Kili’s jaw. And just like that the problem between them was done.

When he was finished, Fili dusted the hairs from Kili’s skin, every feather light touch making Kili burn.

‘You should wash off, otherwise you’re going to itch.’ Fili said, but he made no attempt to get Kili off his lap. Instead, he actually put his arms around Kili and pulled him close enough for their chests to touch and their mouths to be an inch apart. Kili wrapped his arms around Fili’s shoulders, watching as his blue eyes darkened and feeling his cock harden underneath him. He let go of Kili with one hand, bringing it up to drift over Kili’s own tattoo that covered the right side of his chest, making Kili catch his breath when his fingers sought out the nipple, lightly teasing it.

‘You are not the only one who has missed this.’ he said in a low voice and Kili leaned forward to touch their foreheads together. They rested like that, both getting more aroused as the minutes passed.

And this was their secret. That they both needed this, craved it. That their hearts beat in time and every time they lay together made their spirits soar.

‘I love you _kidhuzurâl_ ’ Kili murmured.

‘I love you too _askadith_.’ Fili replied, then leaned forward and kissed him. It was slow and gentle, but Kili didn’t want this. He wanted what his heart and body secretly craved, to make his brother lose control of himself and take him, rough and desperate. He nudged Fili’s lips with his tongue and his persistence paid off when Fili opened his mouth and responded, the hand on Kili’s chest moving to tangle in his dark hair. But he needed just a little more impetus. He pushed back from Fili, noting with satisfaction how Fili followed his mouth.

‘We should probably get back.’ He said, voice rough with desire. ‘The others will be wondering where we are.’ He wriggled, as if trying to get away, while in reality he was simply grinding down on Fili’s cock. It had the desired effect. Fili growled low in his throat and took possession of his mouth, kissing Kili passionately until he was breathless. The hand in his hair tightened and the hand on his back moved to his arse, slipping beneath the waistband of his breeches and groping him quite thoroughly. When Fili finally let him go, Kili’s head was swimming as it always did when his brother kissed him.

‘I think that we can be spared to have a bath.’ Fili said, nosing at his neck. ‘They will probably be very thankful in fact, especially considering the way you smell.’ He gave the junction of Kili’s neck and shoulder a gentle bite, ignoring the outraged noise his comment elicited. ‘Now take your clothes off and get in the water _nadadith_.’ Kili wasted no time in scrambling to his feet and stripping the rest of his clothes off. It didn’t take him long and he turned to give Fili the benefit of his nakedness. The heated look in his brother’s eyes told it was very much appreciated.

‘Best you hurry up Fee.’ he said, grinning wolfishly as he backed into the pool, wincing slightly at the cold water. ‘I’ll be finished before you even get in.’ Fili was up in a flash, and out of his clothes in two. Then he practically stalked into the water, crowding into Kili’s space and taking him by the hips. His one hand slipped down Kili’s wet skin, wrapping around his cock and stroking lightly. Kili threw back his head, keening at the touch that went straight through him.

‘Mahal, Fee.’ he breathed, ‘I want you.’

‘In time _nadadith_.’ Fili said, his other hand moving back around Kili to slide down the small of his back. He leaned in, biting and licking Kili’s neck until Kili was shuddering under his hand and mouth.

‘Fee.’ he moaned, and dragged his nails down Fili’s shoulders, feeling the shiver that run under Fili’s skin. ‘Please.’ he bit the skin of his shoulder, tongue lapping at the mark he left. Fili gave an answering moan, and gripped Kili’s waist, lifting him easily so Kili could wrap his legs around his hips. He waded them out to where their clothes lay in a pile. He got to his knees, still holding Kili balanced against him, and lowered them both to the pile. The he reached for his coat once more, digging in an inner pocket and withdrawing the metal vial of mineral oil he kept for his knives. He knelt back on his heels, pouring enough on his fingers to allow them slide inside Kili unimpeded, then closed it and chucked it back into his coat. Kili lay watching him, dark eyes glowing with anticipation. Fili took one of his legs, bracing it against his shoulder, biting gently at the soft skin on the calf before reaching down and pressing two fingers inside of him, incredibly slow at first but soon building to a steady rhythm as kili lay back, eyes closed and mouth open as he drowned in sensation. He panted loudly, pushing back as Fili worked him open quickly and quietly, only his laboured breathing giving him away. Then he lowered himself onto Kili, hooking the leg he held over his him, lined up and thrust inside Kili. He propped himself up on both hands, looking down into Kili’s hazel eyes. Kili gazed back, lost in the blue that was more vibrant that a thousand sapphires. Then they started moving together, the push and pull they had perfected decades before, their eyes locked and their breathing falling into perfect synchronisation. It got harder and faster as they felt the intensity build and then they were bucking against each other, the sound of their harsh breaths almost deafening in the quiet. Kili came first, spurred on by a change in angle and Fili’s hand on his cock. He let himself go, crying out once and bearing down on his brother. Fili came soon after, silently as usual, the only sign of orgasm a violent shaking of his body and a loud exhalation. His blue eyes were unfocused and soft, and Kili reached up and pulled him down into a kiss.

‘Thank you, Fee.’ he whispered in his ear and Fili held him tightly.

‘Anything for you, brother.’ he whispered back.

*********

When they got back, the excitement over the deer was enough to prevent anyone from asking questions as to why they were clean but distinctly soggy, and why Fili’s braids were undone. But later that night after they had eaten the meal Kili had provided, Fili sat himself down in front of him and Kili wove the braids into his hair as he had done all their lives. And later, when they settled down to sleep, Fili was back at his side.


End file.
